I have traveled a lot the last few years and have stayed at different places for several months. Looking back to most of my pictures and stories, it might seem like a casual few years of traveling, a sabbatical, just enjoying life or an escape from reality.
This impression might be an illusion and not the whole truth. I would primarily describe the last years as a spiritual journey, the journey within or to “find” myself. I felt lost and stuck and didn’t understand why I had arrived at this uncomfortable place for a long time. So, I started moving. Literally, I started moving to seek answers.
I started to do many personality tests and meditations. Also, I contacted many, many, many (spiritual) teachers and coaches. In this respect, I could call myself the follow-up of the bestselling book “Eat, Pray, Love.” However, I also did my fitness practice, drove on scooters, got addicted to unique coffee places, and stayed in contact with the “normal” people. So, I prefer to call it “feeling lost and stuck for a long time” ;-).
Terms like Tantra, Ayahuasca, Manifesting, Sound Healing, Sharing circles, Angels, Alignment, and Soul have been coming into my presence much before I realized if it was something for me or not. But it caught my interest and attention. Is this my explorative mind? Or do I want to believe in something as I did not believe in myself?
I realize that I can’t go back to my old life anymore. It wasn’t just a phase. I have grown, and I see things differently now. I am an emphatic and creative person who loves to explore life and spirit and feel alive. I first had to say goodbye to an old path and create space before building something new. By doing so, I have seen and met my darker places within to find out what it was telling me. I didn’t always know where I was going, but I knew I needed to make friends with this dark, unexplored part within myself. Is that why they call it the spiritual journey? The journey within, to explore the darker aspects of yourself and make friends with it? To know, respect, and love every part of yourself, not only the ‘wanted’ parts?
At this moment, I have been digging enough. I have explored this darker space within and learned my lessons for now, and it is time to empower and create stability and trust again. It is time to build a life that I love and deserve. A life full of true joy and prosperity. I am feeling welcome to receive it :). Thank you, Universe. I believe in you.
